Coping with the fear of death

Many of us fear death for numerous and diverse underlying reasons.

For some, it is the finality, the inevitable and uncontrollable nature of death. For others, it is the likelihood of death being accompanied by pain and suffering and identifying this with the heartache of loved ones being left behind to grieve.

While many of us may experience an everyday fear of death, for some it can be more severe. This is known as Thanatophobia.

Thanatophobia is an example of a phobia, an irrational and intense fear or aversion to something. In this case, the fear is about death, or the dying process and it could be about one’s own demise or someone that you care about.

Symptoms and causes of Thanatophobia

As with many mental health disorders, the cause could be attributed to genetic vulnerability, biological or environmental factors. Thanatophobia can be triggered by a specific event or experience, such as a traumatic, unexpected loss or witnessing another’s difficult or painful death. It’s likely that the fear of death may be at the heart of many other phobias, for example agoraphobia or claustrophobia.

Nonetheless, Thanatophobia causes immense distress, interfering with the afflicted person’s ability to live and function as usual. When thoughts of death are triggered, the anxiety manifests with symptoms of intense panic, dread, depression, frustration, and anger. Avoidance behaviours and overt health anxiety or hypochondriasis are also common presentations.

The physical symptoms can resemble those of a panic attack and may include:

• Dizziness and light-headedness
• Excessive sweating
• Heart palpitations
• Nausea
• Shortness of breath
• Trembling

Thanatophobia is reported to be more commonly found in those with minimal religious beliefs, have various health issues, low self-esteem, lack of satisfaction with their life, and are devoid of closeness with friends and family. It can occur in both males and females of all ages.

Some celebrities, such as Rita Ora, have publicly vocalised their death anxiety, helping to reduce the shame and stigma that prevents many from remaining silent on the matter.

Death anxiety has become a popular topic among philosophers and psychiatrists. Psychiatrist, Irvin Yalom is renowned for his book Staring at the Sun: Overcoming the Terror of Death. In his book, Yalom encourages us to face death as a means to overcome this irrational fear.

Philosopher Alan Watts spoke of death being a normal part of our changing being and stated that “we are in fact both life and death – like a single wave with both crests and troughs – unable to be anything else.”

Eastern philosophy’s spiritual view of death is said to ease death anxiety, unlike the Western view where our lives represent a finite journey toward the final outcome, namely death.

Perhaps the idea that death is the ‘end of the road,’ causes us to be frightened of its approach.

Overcoming the fear of death, and accept it as a part of life

To overcome our fear of death, we perhaps need to change our view of death being the final curtain closure and instead see it as the end of one scene in our show.

Death should be seen as a celebration of our lives and a gentle reminder to live present, enjoy what we have, and feel gratitude for these gifts. Finding meaning in your life and seeing your worth based only on being alive, without needing to prove yourself, will also reduce your fear of dying.

However, constant anxiety is debilitating and to manage fears associated with death some may need explorative or structured types of psychotherapy, such as cognitive behavioural or exposure therapy.

The following are some of the treatments available to help those suffering with Thanatophobia.

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy: This type of therapy addresses beliefs about death, such as feeling that death is “unfair” or that the dying process is always painful. It also provides you with coping strategies to better manage how you react to thoughts of death, such as deep breathing.

Exposure therapy: Gradually exposes you to places, thoughts or situations that relate to death. You might start by writing about how you picture your own death or the death of a loved one. Other exposure techniques could include visiting a hospital, writing a will, reading obituaries, or talking with someone who has a terminal illness.

Mindfulness, meditation, and yoga: Can assist you to still your anxious mind and live in the present moment.

Prescribed medications: With the direction of professional medical advice, medications may help reduce symptoms of anxiety and make it possible to be rational, utilise the coping strategies and skills gained in therapy and ultimately, find peace and pleasure in your life.